Goodbye 2025 Dubai chocolate, hello bomber jackets and flower crowns. This 2026, we are bringing in 2016 energy. Here’s what your year will look like based on your signs:

Happy New Year to all of you who read my horoscopes (and nobody else)!

Horoscopes with a New Year twist.

Open with caution.

It’s TIIIIIIIIIIIIME!

Horoscopes with a Holiday twist.

Open with caution.

It’s spooky season!

Horoscopes with a Halloween twist.

Open with caution.

Back to school edition.

Horoscopes for the week of September 16-22.

Open with caution.

Alpha sigma beta gyatt rizzler check!

Horoscopes for the week of June 24-30.

Open with caution.

Now I wanna hear my track, are you bumpin' that?

Horoscopes for the week of June 17-23.

Open with caution.

SUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Horoscopes for the week of June 10-June 16.

Open with caution.

Happy Pride!

Horoscopes for the week of June 3-June 9.

Open with caution.

They call me hater.

Horoscopes for the week of May 27-June 2.

Open with caution.

My name is Valentine, I have a lot of love to give.

Horoscopes for the week of May 20-26.

Open with caution.

Try not to do — this week.

Horoscopes for the week of May 13-19.

Open with caution.

One love.

Horoscopes for the week of May 6-12.

Open with caution.

I got that horoscope rizz btw

Horoscopes for the week of April 29-May 5.

Open with caution.

The night is still young…

Horoscopes for the week of April 22-28.

Open with caution.

It’s finals season so no holding back!

Horoscopes for the week of April 15-21.

Open with caution.

Y’all see that eclipse? Crazy how the planet works.

Horoscopes for the week of April 8-14.

Open with caution.

Happy April! Unless you’re an Aquarius or Libra.

Horoscopes for the week of April 1-7.

Open with caution.