New Year, New Horoscopes

Goodbye to the 2025 Dubai chocolate, matcha and Labubu era. Say hello to Pokémon Go, bomber jackets, chokers and flower crowns. This 2026, we are bringing in 2016 energy. 

Here’s what your year will look like based on your signs:

Capricorn

December 22 - January 19

I can already see you starting your 2026 year working your butt off and acting like everything is urgent. I understand that it’s inherent in Capricorns to feel most comfortable when you are busy and productive. But 2026 is asking you to start practicing some self-care and try not to be so pessimistic all the time; it’s too gloomy! I suggest listening to some Natasha Bedingfield. 

Aquarius

January 20 - February 18

Aquarius, I need you to really hone in on bringing the concept of new ideas to the table this year. As you have a tendency to break the status quo, you need to be like Debby Ryan sitting down with the President of Disney Channel and saying, “I want to make history.” I believe in you. 

Pisces

February 19 - March 20

Well, hello, Pisces. 🥰 A little birdie told me that if you’re reading this, you should hit up an Aries in 2026. An underrated pairing, if I do say so myself… and I am definitely not writing this because I’m an Aries and Kit Connor is a Pisces.

But on the 0.001% chance that he (yes, Kit Connor) is reading this… take this as a sign.

For the rest of the Pisces, around your zodiac month, you’ll start getting signs to attend an event called Industries in Motion. You must attend if you want a prosperous year! I see a bright future ahead if you do, so be sure to stay tuned…

Actually, that goes for all zodiac signs…so spread the news!

Aries

March 21 - April 19

As a fellow Aries, I can already tell that 2026 is going to be filled with even more chaos and fun. However, the zodiac gods are warning us to beware of impulsive spending. Big things are coming this year, and you’ll want to save your money for them.

Oh, and remember that trip to Hawaii you’ve been dreaming about? It wouldn’t hurt to casually bring it up to a Gemini. I hear they’re very down for a trip this year… but you didn’t hear that from me, though.

Taurus

April 20 - May 20

Taurus, I’m going to hold your hand as I write this. In 2026, I’m getting a vision that someone in your life will recommend you get a Tesla. You must not listen to them.

This is what the stars are telling me: if you get a Tesla in 2026, there will be a blockage in your future blessings. Prosperity and good health are ahead, but only if you do NOT get a Tesla.

Gemini

May 21 - June 20

Ah, Gemini. My amazing, confusing, lovely Geminis… 2026 brings curiosity, conversations, and at least three new interests you’ll swear are permanent. Try not to get lost in a Wikipedia rabbit hole again, though.

Oh, and sometime in 2026, a friend will invite you on a trip. It is vital that you say yes. You may change your mind often, but this year is asking you to seriously commit and go on that trip.

Cancer

June 21 - July 22

Hey, Cancer! In 2026, you’re going to feel a lot, and that’s okay. People may have called you “too emotional” in the past, but this year, they’ll finally see just how caring and intuitive you truly are.

Expect your year to be filled with little surprises that brighten your day. Think: someone bringing you coffee, finding money in an old jacket pocket, or your pillow being perfectly cold when you go to bed.

2026 is your year to feel everything in peace. You’re welcome. 

Leo

July 23 - August 22

As the words of a famous ‘Leo’ once said: “Nooo don’t turn 25, you’re too sexy haha…” 

To all my beloved Leos: keep doing you. You light up every room you enter, whether intentionally or not. Bring that chaos into every party! Don’t let anyone dim your light.

Oh, and Spider-Man: A Brand New Day is coming out around your zodiac month, so try not to get jealous over the attention it’s getting. 

Virgo

August 23 - September 22

Try not to be evil this year… please.

Libra

September 23 - October 22

LIBRAS! Our righteous libras! I can already see you trying to be the middleman of every situation you find yourself in, and we love you for that. 

Oh, but next time you're mediating a fight between a fire sign and a water sign, try to take the fire sign’s side once and a while. Just saying…

Scorpio

October 23 - November 21

Scorpio, I see what you are hiding… don't try to hide from me. In 2026, the stars are advising you to stop acting so nonchalant and unbothered. Losen up a little! 

The year encourages you to let go of grudges you swear you don’t care about anymore and stop holding onto what no longer serves you. 

As one of the most famous Scorpios of all time, Rodrick Heffley once said, “Did you tell mom about the D-O-R-E?... The door?” That’s the energy 2026 needs from you this year. Really hold space with that.

Sagittarius

November 22 - December 21

Hello my fellow Sagittarius friends. Yes, I know it must feel quite unfair that your birthday is stuck at the very end of the year. But fear not! 2026 is shaping up to be your extended year-long birthday celebration! Who needs one special day when you have the entire year working in your favour?  

So what are you waiting for? Get ready for a year full of adventure and independence!